"One of the hardest things to find, I've discovered over the years, is yourself." He reaches over to stroke a finger over Alfred's cheek, tapping under his chin. "But if you feel you have found yourself with us, then that is pleasing to here.
Perhaps you have found your true self, here in the darkness. The darkness often hides things we do not know we seek. But if you know the right questions to ask, the dark can often give us what we never know we needed."
In spite of himself, the stroke across Alfred's cheek makes him redden and squirm a little - maybe it doesn't help that he finally unburied the memory of That Dream, and has finally been attempting to process it ever since.
He nods a couple of times, unsure what to say - and trying very, very hard not to look at how many sex guides Georg has brought into his room. Maybe this introspection was, juuuuust a little bit, an attempt to shift the subject. But it worked, at least for a minute or two.
"Ah, yes," he finally agrees, voice a little meek.
"You're a good boy, Alfred," he says, pressing a light kiss to his forehead, as he stands. "You still have much to learn, about many things. I hope that my son and I can teach you what it is you want to learn. What you need to learn."
He picks up the set of books he's chosen for Alfred, setting them carefully in the boy's lap. "Here you will find all kinds of useful information. From the theoretical to the practical and all manner of things in between."
Reflexively, on instinct, he leans into the kiss - and he's confused when he feels his heart leap a little. Oh, damn his excitability. His cheeks burn a little bit as his thoughts wander further than he would perhaps like them to.
Though...wait, did Georg just insinuate - no, no, that couldn't be.
Right?
Shaking himself from the confused face journey he perhaps didn't realize he was on, he looks down to the books, blushing deep, and back up at Georg. "...Th-thank you. I will...I will definitely...study...them."
He'd been watching Sarah for some time when Alfred had arrived, but immediately there was something in Alfred that drew Georg to him. He could see immediately what his son saw in this boy. So handsome. So... innocent. Something that the darker part of him longs to corrupt. But he tries to press that part of himself down, push it aside.
So he'll settle for this. Helping Alfred in his journey with Herbert. "And of course, if you have any questions, either one of us would be more than happy to help you. Though I can understand wanting to go to Herbert, first."
Alfred is, of course, oblivious to Georg's thoughts about him. He's left instead stumbling over the idea that his boyfriend's father is offering Help, just nebulously enough that it can be taken to mean in general, but in the vicinity of the topic, of the books....
Hm.
He tries to get a smile onto his face, but it's not hard to tell that it's confused, flustered. "...Y-yes, of course," he murmurs, idly opening the top book on the pile and hurriedly closing it again with a start when the page has an...Illustration.
"I do appreciate your guidance as well," he finally manages, struggling with his composure. "I spend more time with Herbert, and he's been...he's been wonderful, but I know there are things you probably would know...ah, a little more about."
Georg settles himself in the chair again, watching Alfred do his best to keep his composure, to bring his thoughts together and form words. He remembers what it was like, to be young and awkward and fumbling. And so he'll be patient.
At that last statement his eyebrows go up again and he steeples his fingers, watching Alfred curiously. "Is that so? Of course, I'm willing to answer anything you might wish to ask me."
Hesitation, a bit of hand-wringing...and then, slowly, he starts to speak again, brows knitting together. "There is...there is one thing, but it's not about...." He can't finish the sentence, instead tapping his finger on the book.
"I was...I was curious...have you ever...seen...Death? Like...the Reaper?"
"Alfred, I must confess something to you. My maker did not stay with me long enough to teach me what might be normal for a vampire or not. I have learned some from experience, and you'll find a large collection of vampire theory books in the library.
But I cannot tell you if Death coming for you themselves is normal or not, no."
That...surprises Alfred, and there is a flash of concern for Georg in his eyes. He...had to learn all of this alone? Is that why he knew of the Professor's books? Because he has simply...read them all? A little frown crosses his lips, and he nods, thoughtfully.
"...I...I see." Another pause, where he thoughtfully reaches up to rub at his own throat. "They were...beautiful. And they had angels with them. They told me to come with them, and when I refused, they looked...angry? Frustrated?"
Something nags at the back of his mind about it, but Alfred can't quite place why.
"I find that fascinating. I wish I could tell you what that means. Perhaps a dream of some sort? Perhaps it really was Death themselves.
I suppose it... would be frustrating. Not being able to do their job. To have someone refuse to die." He wonders if vampires are a befuddlement for them. Not living yet not dead.
"I know it wasn't a dream," he explains further, resting his arms on top of the stack of books on his lap. "I was looking down at my own body, and at Herbert. It was...eerie, but...."
Hm.
"I wasn't...afraid. Not at all. I felt...sad. I didn't want to go." A little sigh. "I don't know, I don't know what it meant. They must have been frustrated."
"And so you didn't. You stayed. You fought Death and returned to us. To Herbert." He sounds amazed. The amount of willpower it must have taken, the strength it took to bring himself back from the brink of death like that.
And all for the love of his son. George finds himself wiping away a tear without quite realizing it.
"I...did." Honestly, he sounds just as amazed at himself - looking up at Georg, he catches the little drop of blood being thoughtlessly wicked away on a long, gaunt finger, and he smiles. It's...it's nice, to feel like people are proud of him.
Especially people he loves.
"But I can't take all the credit, anyway. I'm...I'm not very brave. You must have noticed by now. And...and there was that...that string, between Herbert and I. Because he let me drink his blood, when I...." He trails off. Everyone knows the story by now.
"I think you are. I think you have so much more in you than you realize. You are brave, Alfred. You are stronger than you know. You look Death in the face and told them not today. And yes, your love for Herbert, your connection to him inspired that. But it still came from you."
"...Thank you, Georg." Now it's his turn to wipe away a tear, a little overwhelmed by the older vampire's confidence in him.
In another idle motion, Alfred opens up the top book on the pile again, fidgeting with the pages. He steals a glance downward, not thinking about it - and then does a double take, looking at the drawing he had unearthed. A man, all...tied up?
Georg leans over to take a look at what has Alfred blushing, and laughs softly, tracing a finger over the illustration.
"Ah, well. Some people enjoy giving up control. Allowing themselves to be restrained, so that their lover has complete control over them. It's a show of trust."
In spite of himself, Alfred catches himself staring at the thin, graceful finger tracing across the page, and that perhaps doesn't help with how red he has become. The description makes him squirm, just a little, and he doesn't quite look up yet.
Georg can't help but notice how flustered Alfred is, and is quietly amused by it.
"Truly. It's quite exhilarating, being able to put yourself completely in your partner's hands like that. To let them know you love them, and you trust them with your safety and your pleasure."
The question tumbles out before he can think about it, but not fast enough for him to finish it before biting his lip, very near the color of his favorite jacket at this point.
"I have, yes. I recommend it highly. I think Herbert would enjoy it, as well. You ought to ask him what he thinks about it, I'm certain he'd be delighted to tell you." He can't quite keep the smile off his face, though he's doing his best not to laugh, not wanting Alfred to feel ashamed or embarrassed at all.
Georg doesn't have to make him feel embarrassed or ashamed - he's doing fine with that all on his own. He sighs, a little hopelessly. "There's...a lot that I don't know about this, isn't there?"
"There is so much you can learn. So much that you can be taught."
He taps his finger against the stack of books with a small, knowing smile. "Try reading some of these. If you have questions I know Herbert will be happy to help you try out think that sounds interesting, or that you think you might like. Or if you have something you want to surprise Herbert with, I'm also happy to answer any questions you may have."
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Perhaps you have found your true self, here in the darkness. The darkness often hides things we do not know we seek. But if you know the right questions to ask, the dark can often give us what we never know we needed."
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He nods a couple of times, unsure what to say - and trying very, very hard not to look at how many sex guides Georg has brought into his room. Maybe this introspection was, juuuuust a little bit, an attempt to shift the subject. But it worked, at least for a minute or two.
"Ah, yes," he finally agrees, voice a little meek.
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He picks up the set of books he's chosen for Alfred, setting them carefully in the boy's lap. "Here you will find all kinds of useful information. From the theoretical to the practical and all manner of things in between."
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Though...wait, did Georg just insinuate - no, no, that couldn't be.
Right?
Shaking himself from the confused face journey he perhaps didn't realize he was on, he looks down to the books, blushing deep, and back up at Georg. "...Th-thank you. I will...I will definitely...study...them."
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So he'll settle for this. Helping Alfred in his journey with Herbert. "And of course, if you have any questions, either one of us would be more than happy to help you. Though I can understand wanting to go to Herbert, first."
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Hm.
He tries to get a smile onto his face, but it's not hard to tell that it's confused, flustered. "...Y-yes, of course," he murmurs, idly opening the top book on the pile and hurriedly closing it again with a start when the page has an...Illustration.
"I do appreciate your guidance as well," he finally manages, struggling with his composure. "I spend more time with Herbert, and he's been...he's been wonderful, but I know there are things you probably would know...ah, a little more about."
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At that last statement his eyebrows go up again and he steeples his fingers, watching Alfred curiously. "Is that so? Of course, I'm willing to answer anything you might wish to ask me."
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"I was...I was curious...have you ever...seen...Death? Like...the Reaper?"
Alfred's turn to come out of left field.
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What a curious question. And such a serious question from someone so young. "Why do you ask, Alfred?"
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He fidgets a little, biting his lip for a second.
"Well, I...I did. W-when I turned. Before I woke up. They tried to...to take me? And I was wondering if that was...normal, I guess?"
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But I cannot tell you if Death coming for you themselves is normal or not, no."
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"...I...I see." Another pause, where he thoughtfully reaches up to rub at his own throat. "They were...beautiful. And they had angels with them. They told me to come with them, and when I refused, they looked...angry? Frustrated?"
Something nags at the back of his mind about it, but Alfred can't quite place why.
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I suppose it... would be frustrating. Not being able to do their job. To have someone refuse to die." He wonders if vampires are a befuddlement for them. Not living yet not dead.
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Hm.
"I wasn't...afraid. Not at all. I felt...sad. I didn't want to go." A little sigh. "I don't know, I don't know what it meant. They must have been frustrated."
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And all for the love of his son. George finds himself wiping away a tear without quite realizing it.
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Especially people he loves.
"But I can't take all the credit, anyway. I'm...I'm not very brave. You must have noticed by now. And...and there was that...that string, between Herbert and I. Because he let me drink his blood, when I...." He trails off. Everyone knows the story by now.
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In another idle motion, Alfred opens up the top book on the pile again, fidgeting with the pages. He steals a glance downward, not thinking about it - and then does a double take, looking at the drawing he had unearthed. A man, all...tied up?
"What is...?"
His face goes...very, very red.
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"Ah, well. Some people enjoy giving up control. Allowing themselves to be restrained, so that their lover has complete control over them. It's a show of trust."
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Flustered. So flustered.
"...O-oh...r-r-really...?"
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"Truly. It's quite exhilarating, being able to put yourself completely in your partner's hands like that. To let them know you love them, and you trust them with your safety and your pleasure."
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The question tumbles out before he can think about it, but not fast enough for him to finish it before biting his lip, very near the color of his favorite jacket at this point.
And not at all thinking about Georg tied up.
Nope.
Not at all.
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A beat.
"Talk to him! I mean!"
Georg doesn't have to make him feel embarrassed or ashamed - he's doing fine with that all on his own. He sighs, a little hopelessly. "There's...a lot that I don't know about this, isn't there?"
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He taps his finger against the stack of books with a small, knowing smile. "Try reading some of these. If you have questions I know Herbert will be happy to help you try out think that sounds interesting, or that you think you might like. Or if you have something you want to surprise Herbert with, I'm also happy to answer any questions you may have."
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