Closed RP Spot for loveinsideme/nachtvogel [NSFW WITHIN]

[heyhohey]

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[heyhohey]

Alfred doesn't return the embrace right away - his arms are, for a moment, stiff at his sides, body shaking. But the words help steel him again, bring him back to his senses, and he slowly leans into Herbert, burying his face against soft blonde hair.

"I...I guess I never really...realized how badly it all...hurt."

But he's not coming undone like he normally is - not melting into sobs. He's done plenty of crying.

He just sounds...tired.

So tired.

"There's a reason I don't...talk about it all, Herbert. I don't mean to keep secrets from you. I just - I've locked it all away for such a long time. I had to, or - or I-"

He lets the statement rest there.

[loveinsideme]

"Or you'd break something," he finishes for Alfred. Because the alternative, what he thinks Alfred might mean, makes him seethe with anger and he makes a promise to himself to one day find Alfred's father and make him pay for what he's done to this remarkable boy.

"No emotions will be punished here. We'll buy stacks and stacks of plates for you to throw, whenever you feel the need to let go a little."

[heyhohey]

A little sigh escapes him. He knows full well Herbert caught the meaning, and knows full well that was an artful sidestep.

And that's just as well.

"Yes. I - I don't - like - to do things that might hurt others."

His arms wrap tight around his love, finally embracing him back. "...I...really? You don't think that - seems - wasteful?"

[loveinsideme]

He doesn't want to make Alfred talk about it, if he doesn't have to. If he doesn't want to. It's easy enough to shift subjects and let Alfred talk about what happened to him on his own time.

Herbert hugs Alfred all the more tightly, when he returns the embrace. "What are we wasting? We have the money. Why not be a little frivolous now and then."

[heyhohey]

Good plan, Herbert. It's easier right now to see the cracks Alfred has been so long trying to keep taped together, and it might not take much to shake him apart.

"I...I suppose that's true. I'm not used to thinking that way. My family wasn't - well - everything here is much...more than I am used to, even now." A little sheepish. He's used to making every little thing last as long as it can, after all.

[loveinsideme]

"I know, mon cheri. But we're all here to spoil you. Father and I are very intent on giving you everything your heart could possibly desire.

If you want an entire room of fine china that you can go and smash when you're feeling upset, we'll get it for you. Actually, that sounds like quite a bit of fun."

[heyhohey]

"I - I know. I know that."

Heaving a long, steadying sigh, he rests his forehead exhaustedly against Herbert's shoulder, muffling his voice against his lover's shirt.

"You're both so good to me - and I hope that you know I appreciate it. I do. I'm just...even after all this time, I'm not used to it."

[loveinsideme]

Hebert gently cradles the back of Alfred's head, petting him softly. "We know you do. And in time, you'll grow more used to us spoiling you utterly. We just want you to be happy, mon cheri. And if we're ever too much, please do tell us. We'll try to dote on you slightly less."

[heyhohey]

Oh, now that he's coming down from the fury, he can feel tears starting, in spite of himself. But they aren't sadness - they're catharsis, they're relief. He clings a little.

"All right. I - I will. I know it's out of love, it's just...well, I'm not used to not having to...to prove anything."

[loveinsideme]

"There is nothing you ever need to prove with me, my love. You are who you are, and who you are is brilliant. I love every part of you. Even the sad ones. Even the angry ones. It doesn't matter because all of them come together to make up the man I adore so dearly."